Did you know that, on average, 70,000 thoughts a day pass through your mind? 
Do your habitual thoughts move you forward in a positive direction or do they keep you stagnant and spiraling in addiction: to food, work, bad habits, judging others, shopping, drinking, smoking or drugs?
Isn’t it time to take control of your life and your thought habits? Though thoughts may seem innocent, that’s an illusion. Repetitive thoughts are never without consequence, because all action is preceded by thought.
One random thought that is not fueled with emotion is, indeed, harmless. But recurring beliefs are what shape our destiny. This may not always be obvious because the creative nature of our thoughts is generally not instantaneous. It can take weeks, months or years for us to reap what we have sown.
Nevertheless, it is the thoughts you think and your subsequent actions that determine to a large extent your weight, your health, your bank account and the quality of your relationships.
Your energy is reflected in the thoughts that you are thinking.
Tired, sluggish, weak or negative energy is a direct result of the repetition of harmful thoughts. The cycle is perpetuated by the fact that people can “read your thoughts” since they naturally tune into your energy, subconsciously. If our energy is dark or sticky, people tend to either move away from us or react negatively.
Though being treated in a disrespectful, hurtful way could serve as a catalyst to examine our own thinking and behavior, often we miss the opportunity to self-reflect.
Instead when we don’t like how people behave, our instinct is to take that as confirmation that our negative perception of feeling unsafe or unloved in one way or another, is accurate. Sadly, when the world gives us what we don’t want, our judgmental, circular, unproductive thinking frequently feels justified.
Thoughts Are Habits
Our thought processes are steeped in habit so it takes a commitment to shift them. Think about how challenging it can be to simply start driving a new route to work everyday when there’s a detour.
The same principle holds true whenever we embark on an effort to make any personal changes. The subconscious mind loves routine. It wants to do things the way you’ve always done them.
If your mind tends to be critical and self-deprecating or judgmental, you are going to feel a strong impulse to continue in the same way.
Breaking the Cycle of Emotional Pain
When we experience an unpleasant interaction or reality, whether that be in our relationship or waking up to realize that we are 30 lbs. overweight, there are three steps to breaking the cycle of negative thinking: self-examination, self-honesty and a commitment to lift up your own thinking.
Step One: Self-Examination
Socrates said: Know Thyself. That means being able to see all parts of ourselves, including the parts of our self that we aren’t particularly proud of. Awareness is key because most of the behaviors that hurt ourselves and others are done automatically without conscious intention.
Creating change in your life starts with awareness of your own thoughts and feelings, without judgment.
As you begin to examine yourself more closely, you’ll notice that every action you take, every word you speak, follows a thought. Your thoughts come from one of two places: your ego, chattering mind or your higher, wiser heart self. Depending on which thought you act on, you will get a completely different result.
Because everything we say or do more than three times tends to become habitual, the thoughts you choose are extremely important, because they paint the entire landscape of your life—inside and out.
When your habits are taking you down a path that leads to an undesirable outcome, most likely the source of your thinking is your ego.
The Ego Chattering Mind
This reactive place is concerned with only one thing: your safety. Unfortunately, it has a very limited field of perception. It perceives danger, often, where there is none. The reactive mind takes everything personally and interprets most things and people in its environment as a threat.
Its ruling principle is that you’re not good enough, you don’t have enough and you won’t be enough. Ironically, its defense is attempting to prove to the world that you are enough.
It tends to feel separate from the rest of creation. Even when it does do for others, its motivation and intention is to get something back, and that’s why the ego needs for people to take note of how “good” it is and all that it does for others. The ego is based in lack and limitation.
The ego mind is also very cunning—it has a way of convincing you that’s its reactivity is justified and that you’re not getting your fair share in life.
One way to step up to the ego mind while you are in the throws of an emotional reaction is to remind yourself that if it wasn’t this scenario or person that your ego mind was upset about, it would be something/someone else. Once you realize that the job of the ego is to protect and it does so by always looking for what’s wrong, missing, or how it’s being mistreated, you can begin to see a pattern in the thoughts it feeds you.
You can see how listening to this reactive mind solely can wreak havoc on your life and prevent you from ever truly feeling satisfied or happy. No matter how much good comes into your life the reaction of the ego mind is likely to be entitlement, fear of loss, or arrogance. The word gratitude is not in its vocabulary.
On the other hand, you don’t necessarily want to ignore it, because if you do, it’s likely to rear its ugly head in another area of your life, with even greater force. Since it can’t be ignored, the ego’s messages must be looked at with detachment, love and a curious, open mind.
Step Two: Self-Honesty
After examining your own thoughts and behaviors and bringing them to the light of your awareness, your next step is self-honesty. Write down each thought and ask yourself, “What else is true?” We live in a world of opposites so if it’s true that you are lazy or rude, for example, it’s equally true that you have the qualities of productivity and politeness within you. The same is true for the people in your life.
We draw out what we focus on. Because the chattering, conscious mind tends to have a very narrow focus, when we use self-honesty, we can look at our life situation from a wider vantage point.
Questions to ask are:
1. What is my part in the situation?
2. What pre-existing beliefs/attitudes/memories am I bringing to the table that are influencing what is happening (whether I can see the connection consciously or not)?
3. How’s my energy? Adjectives to describe your energy would be high/low, warm/cold, inviting/rejecting, dark/light.
4. When have I felt this way in the past?
The self-honesty step is not about blaming or fixing yourself but using your awareness and inquiry to discover more about yourself and your world. Self-discovery is incredibly valuable and is a pre-cursor to any kind of change. Sometimes when we begin to look at our self honestly, it’s easy to judge ourselves and feel badly. It’s important to remember to look at ourselves with the eyes of love and mercy, while not excusing behavior we wish to update and change.
Step Three: Lift Up Your Thinking
Uplifting your thought and subsequent behavior patterns is not easily accomplished by conscious willpower alone. When you are entrenched in patterns of emotional eating, reacting negatively to others or feeling over-stressed, it’s not always easy to make the shifts you want to make. Using steps one and two it becomes obvious that much of the distress we experience in life results from being too identified with the negative thinking of the reactive mind.
Although your conscious decision to change is essential, the real changes occur when you seek help beyond the chattering, reactive mind that is wired to protect you from danger (real or imagined) and access the well of love and wisdom in your deeper heart.
In completely contrast to the ego, the wise mind of the heart, the higher mind, is steeped in peace, safety and understanding. It knows at a deep level that all your needs are met, everything is happening exactly as it’s supposed to, nothing means what you think it does and you’re better off not taking anything personally; that you have enough, you’ll always be enough, you’re loved, loving and lovable, and that you are a part of an incredible mystery, connected to all, blessed by the gift of your precious life.
When you connect to your heart by placing your awareness in the center of your chest and breathing deeply into your core, you can relax and connect to an innate sense of safety. When you are quiet and rest in the silence of the higher mind, you can hear what your next step is. The chatter begins to subside and you can connect with the truth of your self, beyond your story, automatic behaviors and reactions.
Maximizing your happiness potential takes making a commitment to doing these three steps on a daily basis. Self-hypnosis is a powerful tool to help you travel to a deeper place within yourself where you can begin to create a new, positive mental program. Take a look at yourself with fresh eyes! Isn’t it time to make your thousands of daily thoughts work to uplift your life to a whole new level? You can do it!
In Health and Happiness,
Rena
P.S. Before you even consider Gastric Bypass Surgery, I’d like to share with you Gastric Bypass HYPNOSIS Surgery which I am very excited about! In fact, I now have my Gastric Bypass Hypnosis Surgery Program available on cd, for those of you who would like to take the program at home. It comes with a $200 coupon towards live, personalized gastric bypass surgery with me, should you decide to do that. Learn more at: Gastric Bypass Hypnosis Surgery now available on cd